God has shown me that He
doesn’t meet my needs immediately; because sometimes He is re-directing me or
preparing me for something new. It is hard at times to trust God when you do
not know what He is going to do but this is how He tests our faith. We must
trust Him and not our situations or circumstances. We must not allow our
emotions or feelings or fleshly desires to get in the way of God’s work. It is
best that we relinquish and give back our feelings, desires and emotions to God
because then we will not hinder nor will we be an obstacle which stands in the
way of God’s will been done over our lives.
This is why God sent His
Holy Spirit to comfort and teach us to rely upon Him. He gives us the strength
and courage needed to go through the trials God wants us face and He increases
our faith which enables us to come through the trials.
We must never rely upon
our own understanding but trust God that He will give us the understanding we
need in Him.
In my life I have had
many critical situations and it has taken many years for me to realise how much
I needed a relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. I made so many bad choices
in my life which was most certainly out of God’s will. I had allowed
resentments, bitterness, unforgiveness and many other things to control my
life. Knowing Jesus changed all those things within me. He showed me how these
things were eroding my life, health and body. The closer I became to Jesus the
more He began to show me what needed to be delivered in me.
I did not want anything
to be in the way of my walk with God. I was willing to go through whatever I
needed to go through with Him and no matter how painful it would be I would
face everything I needed to face with Him. I knew I could not evade these
situations any longer. I knew God wanted what was best for me all He needed
from me was my cooperation.
Bit by bit at the pace I
could take God’s deliverance began. You can never change until you admit you
have been wrong. I had lived my life in the darkness for the first forty years
of my life; I did not intend to live the rest of my life in darkness ever again.
I had surrendered my
all to God through Jesus Christ. I wanted Him to be in control of my life and
gave Him the freedom to do whatever pleased Him. Even it meant that He took
everything away from me that was important to me; I was willing to give
everything up so that Jesus Christ could have His will and His way in my life. As
long as I had God’s presence with me this was all that mattered to me. I have
learnt now how not to depend or lean upon man but have learnt to lean, rely and
depend upon God.
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